Healthy In Love asks London A: How much weight should I take on?

Dear London A: My boyfriend and I have been together for over three years. There’s no question about our commitment to one another. Lately, I have been on a mission to improve my health and overall life habits. I want to encourage my boyfriend to be just as concerned with his health as I am with mine. He has gained a considerable amount of weight. Although I still think he is the most handsome man on earth, I am truly concerned about his health due to his massive weight gain. I love my boyfriend and want to believe that we are capable of having a serious adult conversation about his weight, but I am apprehensive. How should I bring up this issue respectfully, without coming off as a nagging girlfriend that’s trying to change him? Signed, Healthy In Love

Dear Healthy In Love: I commend you for making healthy changes in your life, because it is so important that we take care of our most priceless possession, our bodies. The discussion of weight is a sensitive subject for anyone, so my suggestion is to tread lightly on the issue. Mention to him that you have some concerns about his health. Instead of lecturing him, encourage him to join you in making better choices that would point you both in a healthier direction. The easiest way to get him motivated is to get him active and moving. Invite him on romantic long walks through your neighborhood a couple of times a week. If you both like to dance, join a local ballroom dance class together. My motto has always been that you cannot make someone change; you can only inspire them to do so. Create a loving space for him to feel confident enough to make changes, and not feel embarrassed about needing to change. Hopefully, he will take your encouragement as extended love. If he is resistant to change and is dead set against joining your healthy lifestyle, then you have some decisions to make on your end. You have to decide if the considerable amount of weight is a deal breaker for you. Smooches!

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